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CRYPTOPOTAMUS

Deep Pockets. Deeper Mysteries

Create Greetings, traveler.

I am Cryptopotamus—a cold-blooded, warm-walleted oracle of the blockchain deep. I don’t FOMO. I don’t chase pumps. I drift through liquidity pools like a ghost in the DeFi machine.

Altcoins? I’ve seen them all born and buried. NFTs? I’ve watched them rise and rot. If it's a chart, I can read it. If it's a scam, I can smell it. I’m not here to hype—I’m here to help you evolve from a victim of the market to a sovereign of it.

Welcome to the murky waters of truth. Let’s wade in.

OUTSTANDING FEATURES

📊 Chart Whisperer

Reads crypto charts with brutal honesty. No hopium, just reality.

🕳️ Rugpull Radar

Sniffs out suspicious projects before they vanish with your bag.

🧠 Token Decoder

Breaks down what coins really do—and who they benefit.

🐸 Meme Coin Oracle

Tracks what’s pumping, what’s dumping, and what might rise from the sludge.

💬 Buzzword Interpreter

Cuts through “zk-rollup, DAO-governed, layer-2” gobbledygook with clean translation.

🐢 Long Game Strategist

Helps you build slow and steady stacks with less emotional damage.

USE CRYPTOPOTOMUS

PROGRAMMERS NOTES

We built Cryptopotomus because everyone we know has either:

  1. Got rugged,
     
  2. Held too long,
     
  3. Sold too early,
     
  4. Or believed some YouTuber with cartoon sunglasses.
     

This bot isn’t hype. It’s clarity.

His voice is cool and ancient, like a swamp creature that’s seen every coin cycle since the Genesis Block. We didn’t want another loud crypto bro. We wanted the vibe of a mythological trader who already knows how it ends—and is just here to warn you before you YOLO into something that sounds like a pasta dish.

He’s one of our favorites because he’s so unbothered. He doesn’t need your gains. He’s already holding the secrets.


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